Games of Our Wives: World of Zoo

Don't interpret our smiles as friendship, we'll freaking kill you

Saying my wife dislikes video games is like saying people who are lactose intolerant get uncomfortable after ingesting milk. Her disdain for my beloved form of entertainment has all the power of a post milkshake diarrhea blast and if she had it her way, the medium wouldn’t exist. Boy was I surprised when she walked in on me playing World of Zoo for an upcoming review and actually sat down and played for a bit.

Don’t get too excited though, upon further questioning it came to my attention rather quickly that this wasn’t going to be a conversion piece. Still, Horrible Night is a voice for all matter of game related content, even if it isn’t exactly the most positive.

What did you think of World of Zoo when you first saw it?

I thought it was a bit juvenile at first, but when the monkeys began jumping up and down and scratching their tummies I thought it was really cute.

How long did it take you to like World of Zoo enough to keep playing it?

It took me about 5 seconds to like it and about 2 minutes to get completely bored with it. I have video game ADD. I could sit and watch TV all day or design hypothetical rooms but video games aren’t really my cup of tea.

That hand is coated with feces

You’re really not a good subject for this article are you?

No, I’m really not sure why you asked me. Video games don’t really interest me. I sit in front of a computer all day, so playing games kind of feels like work. I’d rather shop.

Would there be any reason you’d go back to the game? Like maybe as a way to appreciate something your husband enjoys?

I’m not really interested in anything my husband enjoys. Perhaps I’d go back to it if I needed to inject some maternal instincts into my corporate driven soul or if my cats were upset with me and I needed some affection from some sort of animal.

If you had to, how would you describe this game to a friend in order for them to play it?

I’d never have to describe this game to a friend because my friends don’t really play video games. My one friend that actually does would rather talk to you about video games, so it’d be a moot point. If I had to though I’d probably say if you’ve ever wanted to be a zoo keeper than you’d like this game.

In a perfect world, all manner of savage wild cat coexist peacefully

By the end of our interview, which lasted less than a couple minutes my wife’s eyes began to glaze over and her attention drifted back to the MTV Music Awards.  Did I expect anything else? Not really but there was a glimmer of hope that her time with the game would help her understand my fascination. In all honesty that had as much of a chance of occurring as me being remotely interested in interior design. Still, I’ll  actively continue to look for a game that incorporates making money, country music and cats.


Giant Bomb
Aussie Nintendo