Cheap and Dirty Gamer: Sumotori Dreams of Pants Soaking Laughter

sumotori dreams

This is what dreams are made of…

So I might be stretching the word “game” a bit when speaking in reference to Sumotori Dreams. Perhaps drunken push fight simulator would be a more appropriate term, though that shouldn’t take away from the fact that it was still one of the most enjoyable moments I’ve had with interactive media in the last few weeks. For anyone who watched the aftermath of this week’s podcast, you know I’m not exaggerating.

I guess you could consider this a combat game, though your ability to actually control the action is about as random as controlling the outcome of a horse race. You pick an arena for the blocky characters to battle in, choose how many (up to 4) characters will duke…push it out and then from there you watch the magic happen (you can make your sumotori move forward and also push with one hand or two, but this doesn’t really benefit you). From there the winner is literally the last one standing though after fifty or so odd matches, it tended to be the last one to fall down.

The joy of the game comes not from being the victor but by watching the characters struggle with the task at hand. Even once the match is complete they’ll endlessly struggle to rise to their feet (not unlike a person who has drank too much alcohol) and sometimes they’ll even stumble off the edge of the arena and fall to their doom. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to be “playing” the game in this way, but holy cow do I enjoy it.

The game itself is a little over $5.00, which isn’t too bad of a deal despite how limited the “gameplay” might seem to some. The only thing I was limited on was how much I could drink while enjoying it because I didn’t want to pee in my pants. Should you be an overly cost cautious Cheap and Dirty Gamer there are plenty of videos on the internet to watch, all of them worth your time regardless of their production values.

As usual (except for last week, sorry bros), check below for a related but completely random video I put together that will cost you a couple minutes of your life!

Cheap and Dirty Gamer – Being cheap used to be an insult, but with the economy in the dumps it’s now a survival skill. Being dirty also used to be an insult, but that changed after Christina Aguilera’s song came out. Not all gamers have the funds to play full priced games, but that doesn’t mean that gaming quality has to suffer. There are good free and cheap games everywhere, games specifically made for the sexy survivors among us.


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